Here's an update on how my day has gone thus far.
Well....it got harder before it got better, but it did get better.
The floodgates are not closed yet, and I hope they never are. Because, if they ever close then the water is just going to build up again and then...yikes...I'll have another day like today. But, if I just keep them open and feel whatever feelings decide to pop up then maybe I'll really be able to heal and soon one day those waters won't be so strong or violent. Maybe.
Seriously though, I became SO comfortable with my school-mates today. Absolutely everyone knew I was sad...hello I was bawling on skype in the middle of the rec room, no privacy there. And then I kept crying during lectures. But every time I would shed a tear another person would come up and pray for me, or hold me, or tell me "I love you and I would choose you over anyone in the world", or...my favorite: give me chocolate. :)
I skipped both lunch and dinner today, but somehow I feel more full than I have all week. It could be because I just washed these skinny jeans, or maybe its all that bread, or MAYBE it's because pretty much everyone I know wrapped their arms around me to make sure I knew I was loved and cared for.
Thank you to everyone who either messaged me or commented on my post - I read every comment and they all mean a LOT to me.
The other day I got two letters in the mail from two of you guys and just to let you know I LOVED them! Thank you for sending them and thank you to everyone who has prayed for me!
Well, I'm going to go watch Wall-E...pretty much the perfect way to end this very full day. :)
Goooooood Night.
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Clancy, I have really enjoyed reading your blog. I met you many years ago at a MomTime Getaway in Atlanta, GA. You were precious! You sat beside me and my sister and we watched The Facts Of Life reruns. You have grown up to be such a beautiful young woman with a beautiful soul. You are definitely your mother's daughter (in a great way...you are both wonderful women!). I just wanted to reassure you that you will never go through anything alone. But you already know that. God is always there. Venting helps temporarily, though, doesn't it? LOL Take care and enjoy this experience. And keep posting.
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Stephanie
Clancy, I stumbled upon your blog while reasearchng some of your mom's books. I dont know either of you but after reading your blog and her books I feel like we are all friends! You seem like such and intellegent, sensetive and emotional (like me) young woman and you INSPIRE me! If you keep blogging I will keep reading. Thanks for the insight into your world.....Michelle
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